There’s one thing I’ve always wanted to control in my life: the way people “looked at me”, what they thought, their opinion about me – then you tell me, “Deise, that’s impossible” because, yes, it is, I understand it today, but at that time, no one could convince me otherwise – I thought I could and it caused me a lot of pain and confusion.
I have a very proper way of being, I recognize this, and I know that my personal choices weren’t/aren’t easy, so I paid a very high price…
My heart didn’t want to believe that where I wanted to be, was no longer my place. That those people I lived with, didn’t love me enough, they didn’t care enough, or wanted me the way I deserved. That feeling had haunted me for a long time, influenced me in a lot of “bad decisions” during my journey, gave me “bad thoughts” about myself, but you know, I came to the conclusion that living like this was not worth it.
I could not, I can not, and I just won’t control others’ opinions about me!
I kept thinking for a long time that nobody took me seriously – then I thought “how much does that affect me?” “Do I take myself seriously”?
Just because someone does not value you, you should not think you’ve lost or diminished your value. It may sound cliché, but believe me, whoever needs to give you value and importance it is you!
Take yourself seriously: do what you love, don’t lose your voice, share your opinion, love who you are, try to be your best, discover your talents and develop them, change what you need to change, take your own time… LOVE YOURSELF, TREAT YOURSELF.
“Live your life, live your life, let the love inside
It’s your life, it’s your life, your beauty’s deep inside, inside you
Don’t let ‘em bring you down, no, the beauty is inside you
Don’t let ‘em bring you down, no.” – Chris Brown in his song, Beautiful People.
I believe in a God who loves me, who has better answers for me, who takes care of me, and that if I remain, the victory that He has for me will be great, WILL BE MINE! Don’t lose your life trying to please others, respect them, love them, but be yourself.